William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 30, 2010
July 30, 2010
Basil Marceaux for Governor. Have a nice day. (Via Mario Piperni)
News/Politics
Redemption: Just because Tony Hayward was at the helm when British Petroleum dumped millions of gallons of oil into the Gulf of Mexico doesn’t mean it’s his fault. You jerks.
Disperse Me: The countdown is on - how long before the media connects the “1.7 million gallons of dispersant” and the “Where is the Oil” stories. Because I’m thinking that oil may have been dispersed.
Talking Iran: Iran is ready to talk again! Everything’s going to be just fine.
Internet Surveillance: Like the Bush Administration, the Obama Administration isn’t fond of warrants.
Snooki’d: Does Obama know who Snooki is our not? Millions of words will be written about this in the next 24 hours. Then quickly forgotten.
Entertainment
Ellen, Out: Ellen Degeneres is just too nice to be an American Idol judge.
Chelsea’s Wedding: The media is scouring New York for information on Chelsea Clinton’s wedding. Maybe Andrew Breitbart will release a video.
Blogs
Alan Colmes Presents Liberaland: My latest at Colmes’ place - Mamma, don’t let your babies grow up in Red States.
Politico: Let’s see how long Politico will leave up a factually wrong post. The commenters are having no luck getting a correction and neither is Glenn Greenwald.
Americablog: Swift Boat donors charged with ‘extensive securities fraud’ by SEC. Who would have thought they’d be unethical?
Mudflats: The new Sarah Palin Book cover is here! The new Sarah Palin Book cover is here!
Basil Times Two
Personally, I prefer Basil Marceaux Jr. as a candidate.
One of These Guys Guzzled Steroids
Remembering when George H.W. Bush didn’t give the office the respect it requires.
-WKW
Make money The Huffington Post way with Sexism, Hyperbole and Woo
July 29, 2010
Being one of the most influential bloggers on the planet is no easy chore. The endless 18-hour work days can be hard on myself, and my family. Plus, the mainstream media and much of the general public have almost no respect for bloggers. And the pay is horrible.
Now, for the first two issues, there’s little I can do. I am dedicated to the craft, after all. But for the money part, I have learned that there is one thing I can do to make this blog lucrative. And that’s what I’m going to do.
I’m going Huffington Postisize this bitch.
After having read Newsweek’s recent article on The Huffington Post, I saw how Arianna Huffington has turned her vision into a $30-million-a-year site that is now turning a profit. But what I didn’t see in the article were the three main strategies that made The Huffington Post the powerhouse it is today:
Sexism, hyperbole and woo.
And I can do all three of those things. In fact, I can two two of them right this very moment:
William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 29, 2010
July 29, 2010
Look on the bright side - at least the Gulf of Mexico now looks super-bitchin’ under UV lighting.
News/Politics
Arizona Immigration Law: A federal judge strikes down parts of Arizona’s Illegal immigration law, meaning Jan Brewer will spend more of the state’s money on lawyers. And John McCain has a sad.
Obama on The View: Obama goes on The View? How unpresidential. Better to be like Bush and go on “Dr. Phil.”
When it comes to Al Gore, The Daily Beast’s Lloyd Grove is terrified of sexual assault
July 28, 2010
Al Gore has been accused of sexual assault. He has not been charged with anything at this stage, and may or may not be in the future. But a Portland woman has accused him of sexual assault, and according to the National Enquirer, it’s possible two other women are making similar accusations. Gore recently met with Portland police in regard to the allegations.
From CBS News:
Portland police questioned former U.S. Vice President Al Gore in San Francisco Thursday regarding renewed allegations that he sexually assaulted massage therapist Molly Hagerty in 2006, according to TV station KATU.
This sentence accurately and clearly states the situation (note: Hagerty has gone public with her name). Others are using the term “sexual abuse” rather than or along with sexual assault.
Now let’s see how many ways Lloyd Grove of The Daily Beast can translate the terms “sexual assault” or “sexual abuse” in a story about how Gore is handling the allegations from a PR stand point:
“behaved inappropriately”
“the problem”
“the unpleasantness”
“inappropriate touching”
“seamy sexual allegations that rival those once leveled at his former boss, Bill Clinton”
“the toxic fallout polluting his once-gleaming image”
“the ugly charges”
“latest public crucible”
“made unwanted sexual advances”
“take liberties during massage”
“the problems of a former vice president”
The entire article is in the same joking manner, except for the part where Groves describes that “Gore allegedly tried to force her hand down his crotch and repeatedly touched her sexually during a three-hour session.”
But that still doesn’t stop Grove from comparing the alleged sexual assault charges against Gore as being the equal to Bill Clinton’s affair with Monica Lewinsky and Eliot Spitzer’s trysts with prostitutes.
Again, Al Gore has been accused of sexual assault. But you wouldn’t know that if you read Grove’s story. He never uses the term. While there is obviously controversy around said allegations, the allegations have been made. And the allegations are - say it with me Lloyd - that Gore committed sexual assault. There’s no reason to do cartwheels trying to avoid using the term.
-WKW
William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 28, 2010
July 28, 2010
Humans - the cure for a tranquil planet.
News/Politics
Oil Spills for All!: It seems few things are more American that having oil spew out of the ground uncontrollably. It happened in the Gulf of Mexico. It happened in the Gulf of Mexico again. And it happened in Michigan.
Static Kill!: If oil companies spent as much money protecting their product as they did in creating spectacular names for how to stop it when it starts spilling, this would be a far less oily nation.
War Supplemental Passes: Another $37 billion is heading to Afghanistan, where things continue to be quite deadly.
Making a poll fit the narrative - Bush Tax Cuts Edition
July 28, 2010
At Politics Daily, Bruce Drake sticks with politics, and does so in grand “Interpret the data the way to best fit my narrative” style.
In a story titled “Public Divided On What to Do About Expiring Bush Tax Cuts,” Drake takes a look at polling numbers on what the public wants to do with the soon-expiring tax cuts, and decides to ignore the one statistic that should have jumped out at him:
Congress is headed for a battle over whether to let tax cuts passed in 2001 and 2003 under former President Bush expire at the end of the year. When it comes to public opinion on the issue, 30 percent of Americans want to keep all the cuts, 27 percent want to repeal cuts for the wealthy while keeping the others, and 31 percent favor letting all the cuts expire, according to a Pew Research Center/National Journal poll conducted July 22-25. Twelve percent are undecided.
Did you read that as divided? Or did you read that as 58 percent want to repeal tax cuts on the most wealthy, 30 percent want to keep them all, and 12 percent were undecided?
But, hey, what’s the fun of reading it that way when you can talk about how divided the public is on the issue.
The biggest change in public opinion is on tax cuts for the wealthy. In 2008, 37 percent favored letting them expire compared to the 27 percent in the new poll. The number of those who favor keeping all the cuts or who want to get rid of them entirely increased, but by lesser amounts of 5 and 6 points respectively.
Nothing to see here. The public’s divided on the issue.
-WKW
Louie Psihoyos: From “The Cove” to the Gulf and beyond
July 27, 2010
Director and photographer Louie Psihoyos captures images from the Gulf of Mexico.
(image, Gina Papabeis, OPS)
After the unprecedented success of his first film, the Oscar-winning documentary “The Cove,” director and photographer Louie Psihoyos has turned his attention from the the wholesale slaughter of Dolphins in Taiji, Japan to the plight of humanity. Of course, that’s been his focus all along.
“The path that we’re on is so destructive for the future and humanity,” said Psihoyos in a telephone interview. “It’s like a perfect storm going on in the ocean right now.”
Politics Daily must fire Andrew Cohen (updated - and updated again)
July 27, 2010
Stalking a woman - on her wedding day - who spurned you is cause for termination in my book. And that’s exactly what Politics Daily legal analyst Andrew Cohen deserves after penning a column titled “On Her Wedding Day, Saying the Things Left Unsaid”
From WashingtonCityPaper.com:
Creepiest wedding gift in human history? You decide:
The present I humbly send her today is this column; this public note, this irrevocable display of affection and support and gratitude; this worldly absolution from any guilt or sadness she felt between the time she said no to me and the time she said yes to him. No one ought to have to carry that with them into a marriage. I showered her with as much love as I could muster when we were together. I still love her and always will. So I am only too happy to offer my toast to her now, one more time, before she takes her vows.
Politics Daily’s Andrew Cohen is obviously in a pretty weird place in his life right now. And he has decided to share it with us all! So let us count the backhanded compliments Cohen delivers, as “the great love of my life marries today and I am not the groom” [Thanks to Date Lab for the tip]:
* Crazy love: “not enough” or too much? And am I to blame for my own unhappiness, or are you? Oh, it’s probably me:
I had my chance, a few years ago, but did not realize until too late how fleeting my moment with her was meant to be. Whether it was my fault or hers, and, let’s face it, it was probably mine, I will wonder always about the life I might have had with the most loving and loveable woman I have ever known. Sometimes, I finally now understand, love, even crazy love, is not enough. Sometimes, as the romance novelists know, timing is everything.
What struck me quite hard is that in the column (which you can see here, until it is rightly pulled off the Internet) is that one word in the entire disturbed essay is highlighted. That word is “poison.”
I took a look at the page source and copy and pasted the HTML here:
I want to thank her, mostly, for rescuing me from hopelessness. When we met, back in the spring of 2005, I was nearly 40 and had been dating off and on for two years following an unexpected divorce. I had lost faith in relationships. I had given up on love. She arrived, unexpectedly, and showed me what was possible. She raised me up from the emotional dead. She drew out of me the
poison of divorce and betrayal. Eleven years younger but already more mature than me, she was dazzling, brilliant, funny, and sweet; she both gave and taught me patience and devotion and sacrifice. No woman before or since ever made me feel as desired, needed, beloved, appreciated as she did. No one has yet made me want her more. Some men live their whole lives without this kind of love. At least I had it for one brief, shining moment.
Politics Daily needs to immediately erase this column, and cut all ties to Andrew Cohen. This is beyond creepy. It’s stalking, if not worse.
Update: From comments at Dagblog: “I agree this is a weird, creepy column, but in Cohen’s defense I doubt he had anything to do with “poison” being hyperlinked. That’s almost certainly because of an automated ad-linker bot run by the host (in this case, AOL). He probably had no idea that would be linked until he saw it posted.”
WKW: A cogent comment. Regardless, my opinion that Cohen has crossed a serious line and must be terminated remains.
Update 2: Lizzie Skurnick at Politics Daily has a rebuttal to Cohen, titled “How Not to Congratulate Your Ex on Her Wedding Day” that deserves a read.
Update 3: Cohen just keeps on digging.
-WKW
William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 27, 2010
July 27, 2010
Paul Briggs does an outstanding imitation of how the Obama Administration handled the Shirley Sherrod video nontroversy.
News/Politics
Wikibombing: How will the U.S. react to the Wikileaks developments? Mostly with denials and bombs in Afghanistan.
Wikileaker Speaks: Julian Assange tells you all about his mission, getting the word out before the death squads show up.
The Money Hole: An audit shows $8.7 billion in Iraqi funds is unaccounted for. A nickle here, a dime there …
Islamaphobia: As a matter of fact, that Islamic Center won’t be built at Ground Zero.
He, Al Franken: The Senator talks Democratic agenda and Net neutrality: “Net neutrality is the First Amendment issue of our time.”
BP’s Loss: British Petroleum announces Tony Hayward is out and that they’ve lost $17 billion after being unable to control its product.
Back in Iran: Russia once again stands between Iran and the West.
Blogging Warren: Bloggers love Elizabeth Warren - maybe because she’s one of them?
Pakistan’s Double Play: NY Times Magazine’s look at how Pakistan is playing both sides.
Jailbreak!: It’s your iPhone. Now you can do what you want with it legally.
Today in History
1967: The first ATM machine was installed. The line was ridiculous.
What Scientologists Really Believe
“A fool and his money need to be audited.”
Blogs
Good As You: What NOM really wants.
Sadly, No!: Erick and the Angry Inch.
Daily Kos: As shakedowns go, it doesn’t seem that British Petroleum has gotten the $20-billion memo.
Tweet of the Day
“Breaking: Andrew Breitbart admits release of edited Sherrod tape was result of “massage gone awry.” And meth. Shitloads of meth”
-WKW
Ted Haggard over-repents, shooting past straight and right back to Gay
July 26, 2010
COLORADO - Hours after admitting that his sexual liason with a male prostitute was a “massage gone awry,” Ted Haggard has admitted he is again feeling Gay urges.
“What can I say,” said Haggard. “I over-repented and shot straight past being straight.”
Haggard, who gets paid to tell people how they are supposed to act, was forced to resign nearly four years ago as president of the politically powerful National Association of Evangelicals and to step down from the megachurch he founded, after admitting that he had bought methamphetamine from, and had a sexual encounter with a gay prostitute.
This time around, Haggard said it was a trip to a steam bath gone horribly wrong.
“I’m just minding my heterosexual business having a steam and then all hell broke loose,” said Haggard. “Then all of a sudden I’m doing meth and having sex with a dude named Chuck. I blame the steam.”
Haggard recently started a new church in his backyard and has built his congregation to more than 200 in just two months.
“Tiger Woods needs to golf. Michael Vick needs to be playing football,” said Haggard, who also admitted to electrocuting a puppy during a “trip to a dog park gone awry.”
While this latest setback threatens his non-stop attempt to tell Gays and Lesbians they are going to Hell, Haggard said he feels like he’s ready to give it all one more shot.
“I need to be leading a church,” said Haggard. “I’m hoping that this time around, I repent the exact right amount to be heterosexual.”
-WKW
Obama to appear on “The View” - But not with Elisabeth Hasselbeck
July 26, 2010
WASHINGTON - Barack Obama will become the first sitting President to appear on a daytime talk show, as he will join the ladies of “The View” later this week - with one notable exception.
“The Obama Administration made it perfectly clear that he would not appear on the show if Elisabeth Hasselbeck is even allowed on the set,” said an insider at “The View.” “And no one here seems to have a problem with that.”
For the show with Obama, Hasselbeck will be replaced by MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow. For the duration of the show, Hasselbeck will be placed under house arrest by the Secret Service, to guarantee she gets nowhere near the President, sources say.
While some at “The View” have complained that the Obama Administration is shying away from a potential showdown with Hasselbeck - one of the most important Conservative voices in Hollywood - others have painted in much more sinister colors.
“Once again, Obama is showing his hatred of white people,” said Glenn Beck today on his radio show. “If there was ever a more perfect example of a beautiful Aryan woman, it’s Hasselbeck. And that threatens Obama.”
For her part, Hasselbeck said she’s trying to see the bright side to the snub.
“I would have really enjoyed giving the President a piece of my mind,” said Hasselbeck. “But that’s about all I have, so maybe this is for the best.
“And maybe some woman will be watching and see I’m not there and decide not to have a superficial abortion,” added Hasselbeck. “Praise Jesus.”
Still, Hasselbeck has some in her corner, as journalists Andrew Breitbart and Tucker Carlson have announced that they will launch a full investigation into the Hasselbeck snub, as well as investigations into Obama’s choice of ties, his connection to the e-mail group Journolist and a expose on Michelle Obama’s dresses.
-WKW
Thank you, Nicolau
July 26, 2010
Every visit to my In-Law’s home began with a spectacular greeting from their beloved Yorkshire Terrier, Nicolau. His excitement at seeing my wife and I always set the stage for a wonderful visit.
Nicolau passed away recently, leaving a hole in my In-Law’s home far larger than his tiny, 7-pound body. But the little dog gave and accepted more love than many humans will in a lifetime. He was full of energy and personality. He is and will continue to be missed by our entire family.
Thank you for all that you gave us, Nica. Wherever you are, I’m sure you’re chasing little cheeseburgers and not giving female dogs (or flirty stuffed rhinos) a moment of rest.
-WKW
William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 26, 2010
July 26, 2010
Let’s take a walk.
News
War Games: South Korea and the U.S. are conducting war games in an attempt to see just how friggin’ nuts Kim Jong-Il can get.
Wikileaks Documents: The largest intelligence leak in history shines a light on Afghanistan and puts Wikileaks in the crosshairs.
Corning Cocoa: Hedge fund managers weren’t hated enough, so one of them decided to corner the cocoa market and crank up the cost of chocolate.
Blogerty Goodness: If you used Blogerty, you’ll be getting your information back. Unless you’re a terrorist. Then you can suck it.
Hayward Out at BP?: Tony Hayward is likely a goner at British Petroleum after his PR effort helped make things work. Hope he’ll get by on whatever multi-million severance package he gets.
Today in History
The Cuban Revolution began on this day in 1953, led by an elite named Fidel Castro who figured the lesser people would be happier poor. Or dead if they bitched about it.
Blogs
News of the Restless: A thorough collection of F’n wankers.
Martin Wolf: The political genius of supply-side economics.
Paul Krugman: The only thing Republicans disliked about George W. Bush were his approval ratings, not his economics.
Media Matters: Social Security is a ponzi scheme, so kids today should put down the video games and get to work.
Word of the Week
-WKW
Increase your sales by telling liberals they need to be eliminated
July 23, 2010
To paraphrase Louis CK - it’s true, people are just different in Oklahoma.
“Terrell’s* Siding - let’s end this secular socialism right now.” Now that’s salesmanship.
*As pointed out by AndrewGatto on Twitter: “As a bonus, all of the related vids seem to be about Terrell Owens.”
-WKW
William K. Wolfrum’s Morning – July 23, 2010
July 23, 2010
Before you watch this campaign video for Alvin Greene, remember one important thing - you’ll never be able to unwatch it.
News/Politics
What’s Another War?: North Korea has threatened a “physical response” to joint U.S. and South Korea military exercises. But, hey, saner heads will prevail, right?
An Independent Kosovo: The World Court says Kosovo’s unilateral secession from Serbia in 2008 did not violate international law.
Buy American: Ford announces a solid profit.
Put this in your pipe and smoke it: If California legalizes marijuana, the benefits will easily surpass any negative effects as pot will go corporate. (negative effects include muchies, watching bad TV shows, giggling.)
Sherrod Firing: No-Drama Obama tries to get control of the Shirley Sherrod mess, which shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
Climate Change: Maybe the next Democratic President will get around to doing something about climate change.
Newsiness
Aliens Amongst Us: The fifth person that reads this will believe that space aliens are living amongst us, disguised as humans.
Mugged: For your viewing pleasure, some famous mug shots.
Mormonism Vs. The Necronomicon
“Either you’ll go mad from the revelation, or be on your knees begging for a new dark age.”
Blogs
Politics Daily: Sarah Palin has all but admitted she’s not tough enough to run for President.
Digby: A long but worthwhile guest post by Batacchio on the Social Contract.
Mediaite: Republicans won’t be letting go of Shirley Sherrod or the USDA any time soon.
Instaputz: Andrew Breitbart’s ability to be wrong is multifaceted.
Shoq Value: Integrity tests should apply to information, too.
-WKW
